“So, how’s the doctor of yours doing” Neha asks, making Khanak chuckle. They somehow managed to submit Neha’s assignment on time, without getting caught.
“Firstly, he is not mine and secondly, he is not a doctor, not even studying for one, how many times do I need to tell you that?” Khanak answers with fake exasperation.
“He is going to work in a hospital, isn’t he?” Neha asks with an exaggerated eye role. Dramatics of her friend never fails in making Khanak laugh. Khanak only manages to nod her head in reply, all the while shaking her head in amusement. “then he is a doctor!” Neha declares in a tone that even a supreme court judge would have a hard time second guessing.
“And don’t for a second think I missed the smug smile on your face when I saw you today or the few extra minutes you guys took after reaching here” this time Khanak’s exasperation was not fake.
“Yeah, so what? We were talking about some useless things!” Way to go Khanak, Khanak curses herself in her mind sarcastically. Being defensive when you don’t have any need to is the worst way of lying, even she knows it. Especially when the one you are trying to lie to is someone like her friend. Behind all the drama queen act of Neha, there is a very perceptive person hiding who notices everything going around herself.
“Useless? Yeah, right! You don’t look that much smug even when you somehow manage to shut me up, which doesn’t happen often let me remind you” Neha tells her. And Khanak thinks to herself that she was feeling smug for making Ankan fluster. His actions from this morning brought a smile on her face with ever present feeling of guilt associated with it.
“I saw that smile! Tell me… Tell me” Neha demands and Khanak gives her friend word by word report of this morning.
“you go, girl! Neha cheers as Khanak reaches the point of her kissing Ankan, making Khanak blush. “Though, I am disappointed that you only kissed him on his cheek, I mean that guy is so cute, but I am happy that you finally decided to get both of you out of misery and chose the doctor and not the other guy who hurt you” Neha’s words made Khanak wince. Taking train of her thoughts to that whole disastrous week in September of last year.
September of their first year of college
Khanak can’t wait for Rishav to come home from his hostel. Ever since their colleges has started three of them have never hung out – Ankan is busy being the golden boy among his new friends, Rishav is never home, and Khanak …well it’s not like she hasn’t made any new friends but she misses her old friends – her bestfriends. For so long she has been with just Rishav and Ankan that making new friends doesn’t come naturally to her. She didn’t ever need to learn the art of friend making. She was ten when she came to Delhi and in the first hour of her first day at school, she has made enemies with Rishav and by the time the first day ended, she was friends with Rishav and Ankan and by extension every friend of theirs.
Khanak smiles at her old memories. It has been just few months since the school has ended but it already feels like that everything has changed and maybe things have really changed but Khanak is not ready to accept it. She needs to know that her friendship with Rishav and Ankan is same as it was. And besides she also has this feeling of being left out. These days she feels as if Ankan and Rishav has moved forward leaving her behind. Before whenever those two used to meet, she was always with them but now that both of them study in the same college and Khanak doesn’t, they meet every day without Khanak. And she is afraid that they don’t even miss her, it certainly seems like that to her. They don’t call her; they don’t include her in their talks and if by luck she gets one day when Rishav isn’t at hostel and Ankan isn’t busy they keep talking about their new friends, their classes, their professors, which she has no idea about. That’s why she is so determined to make this week different or just like old times.
‘this week is going to be perfect’ khanak talks to herself. She has already made the plan to visit all the places where they used to hang out and have lots of photos clicked just so that next time when she feels left alone, she will have some sort of proof that she isn’t forgotten.
‘Khanak, beta, will you come to the boutique this afternoon, just for 3 hours? Please? I need help” Her mother asks her, coming into her room, breaking the chain of her thoughts.
“but Mom! I told you that I won’t come today” Khanak whines, pouting at her mother.
“I will pay you double” Her mother offers with a sigh of resignation. But Khanak isn’t fooled by the sigh. There is a victorious glint in her mother’s eyes that Khanak narrows her eyes at. Her mother knows she won’t ever refuse the offer of double pay. What college student would refuse some extra bucks?! Khanak certainly wouldn’t!
“okay but only for three hours! Not a single minute extra than that” Khanak warns her mother but then let a smile slip onto her face. Some extra money for just sitting in the boutique and look at all the pretty dresses made by her mother- not bad deal. Oh, who is she kidding, it’s a great deal! The thought bringing a giddy smile on her face.
“Oh, and the shop is in mess so clean it while you are there, okay?” Forget what she has just said about it being a great deal – it’s a horrible deal. Her mother is a very talented but also a very messy worker. Sorting the mess out of her mother’s workplace is almost as impossible as putting out the fire of hell. Khanak groans at what she has gotten herself into.
“What? Did you think earning extra money is so easy?” Her mother asks with a grin.
“You are a mean mother” Khanak accuses childishly.
“No beta, I am a loving mother. I am just a very mean employer” Her mother announces with a triumphant smirk.
“Are you asking me to come today just so you could have me clean your workplace?” Khanak asks with her eyes squinting at her mother
“what do you think?” Khanak’s mother wink at Khanak and leaves her pouting. What does she think? She thinks that if anyone would do it, then it’s her mother.
Khanak shakes her head at her mother’s nature. For as long she remembers, her mother has been the kind of person who brings light and joy in a room just by being in it. After Khanak’s father died and she went into denial, her mother stood as the iron pillar and handled everything without letting the grief kill her cheerful nature.
Khanak remembers the day when she got out of denial and finally accepted that her father isn’t ever coming back. She has cried for hours and her mother has let her but when Khanak stopped crying, her mother came in her room, sat beside her without saying anything… she just sat there, waiting for Khanak to make the first move.
“He won’t read to me ever again” Her father reading to her has been her one of the favorite times of a day. She used to love hearing childish stories in his heavy voice.
“No, he won’t” Her mother has replied without any extra addition of sympathy. In reply Khanak has just nodded her head, finally ready to accept the truth. “But I am here and I will be here for a long time”.
And her mother has been, still is, always here with Khanak.
Khanak doesn’t want anything more than to be there for her mother, whenever her mother needs Khanak to be.
‘But, still cleaning the boutique! Isn’t it too much?’ Khanak grumbles to herself, thinking how she will have to change the plan and ask Ankan to not pick her up and meet her directly at the venue and she will also have to remind him to keep calling Rishav to be on time otherwise their evening plan will become night plan.